Skip to main content

You don't know it, but I'm Your daughter.

You Don't Know It, But I'm Your Daughter.
Beware of those DNA tests.
by Jeff Jordan

If you have or ever thought of having your origins discovered by submitting DNA for testing? This s a cautionary tale. I provided my "spit in the tube" sample supposedly to help my granddaughter, Abbott build a family tree. Given the number of divorces and blended families, this was going to be more like a bush than a tree.

It was a ruse. The real story was that my oldest son and his family did submit DNA to Ancestry and Abbott was building a family tree. From what I understand things were going well until she got an email, through Ancestry with a question from a young lady in Minnesota.

The request was something like, 'I'm doing our family tree and all of these Jordans keep showing up and no one in our family knows who you are.' Abbott turned it over to her dad, Brad who just ignored it. Another email came. My son, arranged for a phone conversation.

His question was, "If we are related how close are we?' The answer was this young lady was a first cousin to Brad's girls, but then that means your mother and I are brother & sister. And my Dad is her...Holy shit

A few weeks later, my son called me to tell me he had been conversing with a woman in Minnesota who was, according to the company that runs the database, my daughter. It turned out this was not a joke. Although, I considered that for a moment knowing full well the extent of my son's sense of humor.

The information he gave me was not helpful to me in identifying the women. At the time, I was married to Brad's mother however, there was a time of separation in our marriage. I have to admit there were a couple of candidates.

I asked my son to query my daughter as to whether she wanted to talk to me. She did, and we eventually had a telephone conversation. At the sound of her voice, I had to remind myself, this is my daughter. She, on the other hand, was dealing with the fact that the man she clearly loves and respects is not her birth father. Her mother, who passed away ten years ago, might have thought that she took this secret to her grave, but DNA busted her in the end.

I told my daughter that I wasn't sure who her mother was. We tried to cross-reference a couple of things common schools, nearby neighborhoods, and places we might have worked together.  We were getting nowhere.

As it turned out, I was thinking further along in my lifetime, and she wasn't aware of the job location where her mother and I intersected until she mentioned her dad's nickname. He had a rather distinctive moniker because he was a musician. I'd had never met him, but I knew I had a brief relationship with his wife.

Her mother and I worked together for a time. She was married and a child. The relationship was not unlike workplace romances. We flirted, then it got to be a closer relationship. I don't know why she needed what I brought to our affair, but I know I was infatuated with her. When we broke it off, it was mutual, but not without pain on my part. We both left that workplace, and I never saw her again. Because of our affair, I  find I have a daughter, who is my oldest child.  Because she has children, I have one more grandchildren and a great-grandchild.

I had a chance to meet my daughter, my granddaughter, and my grandaughter's husband and their little guy, my great-grandson. The meeting was cordial,  exciting and wonderful in so many ways. We're going to keep in touch and let the future become it might hold for us.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Once A Young Man

 My late friend Jack had a saying that's lost on young people; it sure was lost on me. With his version of a Finnish accent, he'd say, " We are too soon old and too late, smart." I've never heard anybody answer the question about returning and reliving their youth that didn't include the covariate that they would know what they know now. Maturation and accepting the onset of the later years of our life goes a long way to mellowing our passions. Chicago Bear fans are less intimidating, and the members of the opposite sex who are age appropriate are far more appealing than we might have thought in our youth. Yes, I will admit some men still try to relive their youth in ways that defy logic. This facet of two late smart prevents athletes from realizing when their best years are behind them. More men than women seem to delude themselves into believing that members of the opposite sex half their age are suitable mates.  I'm not going to deny that some of us old...

Which Doctor Do I Call?

 It started with weepy, crusty eyes. Then my left leg started acting like it had a swivel for a knee. Suddenly, I was experiencing a lack of energy. To top it off, I wasn't getting a good night's sleep. Who do ya call? In my case, I'm calling my primary. My eye problem might need a specialist. Since I have CMT, my leg problem could be neuropathy or orthopedic. My cancer treatments might lead to my lack of pep. And despite using my pillows to attain perfect comfort, my aching legs and lower back keep me awake. I'm going to be cutting back a bit since my health seems to be melting before my weepy, crusty eyes. I've quit my tutoring gig. This hurts me. My student, six-year-old Aydn Collins, is a joy to be with. I had hoped my contribution to his education would be good for him. The biggest problem with the job is getting in and out of the school. Featuring long walks from and back to the parking lot and the mountain of stairs. The older schools are wonderful in almost ...

Watching the Oldies

Note: Last week's post was late. There is a reason. Read on.  Classic Film: From Here To Eternity The film opens in Hawaii in 1941. The film stars Bur Lancaster, Mongomery Clift, Deborah Carr and Donna Reed. It is before the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor. The only scene I remember is a scene many people who never watched the entire film have seen. It shows Bert Lancaster and Deborah Carr lying on a sandy beach, kissing as an incoming washed over them. Given the popularity of that scene, it was amazing to me that that iconic image is only seconds long in the film. The story is about the innocence of army personnel with no idea what's coming. Lancaster literally runs the squad while his Captain lets him take charge so he can campaign for his promotion and cheat on his wife.  To make up for the disrespect he has for his commanding officer, Lancaster beds his Captain's officer's wife only to fall in love with her.  Clift's character suffers the humiliation of an offic...